Five years ago I said goodbye to my anti-trafficking coworkers who’d become family to me. God knit our hearts together over rescues, hotline calls, and trainings filled with worship and tears. Now I run a nonprofit dedicated to sharing the good news of our sexuality and helping parents pass that on to the next generation of image-bearers of God. God has faithfully shown me every step and continues to today.
TrueNorth is entering a new year of ministry with greater clarity and even greater resolve. Initially, our underlying mission was to end sex trafficking by going upstream and dealing with a root cause (porn), but God knew all along that there was a need to address something even deeper and more nefarious than porn, and that was the destruction of sexuality as He designed.
So why are we narrowing our ministry focus to parents?
Parents are the key to ensuring that the Church becomes a light to a culture that is driven toward the worship of self with little regard for the One sent to save us from ourselves. Parents are tasked by God to impart grace and truth related to sexuality in a way that is in keeping with our times and in ways that honor Him. Yet most of today’s parents were never taught God’s good design for sexuality, much less how to teach their children.
And that’s why TrueNorth is going where God has led us, to teach, encourage, and guide parents, giving them tools to understand their own sexuality and helping them pass that understanding on to their kids.
A mom who hosted an Allies talk this year told me she and several friends had stayed up until after midnight discussing all that I’d shared. I can only imagine the laughter and tears that flowed.
There’s something that happens when we begin to open up about issues related to sexuality. Shame begins to fall away as we discover a safe place in which to share about something so sensitive. We test the waters…
“I found porn in my dad’s dresser drawer when I was eight. I had no idea why I kept going back to look at it, but I did.”
“My brother abused me when I was six and I’ve only told a few people. I’ve forgiven him, but I’m not sure if I’ll ever get over the shame. And I’m pretty sure he’s never forgiven himself.”
“I’ve struggled with a dislike of my body ever since I was a teen and realized God didn’t make me like the women I saw in porn.”
“Anne talked about sex and sexuality being sacred, but my sexuality feels far from sacred. In fact, I’m not sure if it’s ever even felt close to that.”
Then there was the discussion after a different talk. Dads began opening up during our Q&A time.
“Growing up as a latch-key kid, I saw lots of porn. I’m free from the addiction, but I’m not free from the shame. I think that’s what’s holding me back from talking with my kids about all this.”
“I knew a lot about sex by the time I was in the third grade, mainly through my friends. My parents never said a word. It just wasn’t something we talked about. I see how much my kids really need an ally.”
“I had no idea the statistics were so high on childhood sexual abuse. I know it took me a long time to be able to talk about mine.”
There are moments of sacred silence. Heads nod. Hearts connect. Hands reach out. This is the power of authenticity and grace. These conversations are starting points to healing and growth. They’re connecting spouses in deep, intimate ways. They’re turning friendships into relationships. And they’re freeing parents up to interact more authentically with kids growing up in the most sexualized culture I’ve ever known. Parents have a great opportunity and a great call.
Everyone reading this either is a parent or was raised by one. Others hope to be one someday. Many of you are now grandparents looking into young, tender eyes and praying that the world won’t be too hard on your precious one. But we all know the challenges will come.
How equipped will this love of yours be when porn finds her?
Will his sexual encounters lead him to hide from his parents or turn to them for answers and direction?
When she first sees porn will the enemy plant seeds of doubt over God’s good design of her body?
Will she feel safe in talking with her parents about what she’s seen?
Will he have any idea what to do if he’s touched inappropriately or if he’s tempted to touch someone in a sexual way?
Will this child’s sexuality be shaped mostly by the world or by his or her parents and God’s truth?
We’ve developed our Allies talk as an entry point for parents to begin needed conversations on sexual topics with each other, with their kids, and with God. Lies need to be exposed and truth found. Hearts need to be turned from sexual sin and healed from sexual wounds. Conversations pave the way for shame to crumble and hearts to thrive.
The book I’m writing for parents will take our message further, and we have other plans in the works that we’ll begin sharing over the next several months. Watch for a more focused blog presence dedicated to encouraging and equipping moms and dads. Please share these with parents you know and love.
The message of the sacredness of sexuality is long overdue, and we’re honored to share it. Pray God blesses our work.
How can we serve you? What topics should we cover? What are some of your greatest challenges? Email me at email@example.com. I’d love to have your input.
The primary purpose of a home is to reflect and to distribute the love of Christ. Anything that usurps that is idolatrous.¹ Ravi Zacharias
We want to help you create the kind of home that is abounding in grace and rooted in love and truth. For you, for your kids, and for God’s glory. Blessings on your new year!
Founder and CEO
TrueNorth Freedom Project Atlanta, GA
TrueNorth is a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization. Please consider joining us as a financial partner. To donate, click here.