Wired for Intimacy: How Pornography Hijacks the Male Brain | A book review

Many Jesus-loving Christians—young and old, male and female—are falling prey to porn and the bondage it brings.

Their friends or family, often out of their own pain or frustration, may shame, rebuke, or offer pat suggestions like “Just pray more,” or “You need more faith.” Others say, “It’s an issue of the heart.” While remarks from well-meaning fellow Christians may be true, they’re often not helpful. And while a struggle with sexual sin such as porn use may be a heart issue, it’s also a head issue.

To learn how porn affects the brain and why it’s so addictive, I consulted someone […]

A Life Restored

For many years we have had an old antique bedside table in our bedroom. I wouldn’t say it was particularly valuable or beautiful. The top was built out of five pieces of oak wood glued together to make a wide top. The finish was worn and showed numerous water rings, cuts, deep scratches, and large nail holes where repair had been attempted over the years. The top was cracked in two at one of the glue joints and it was not level. The legs were very rickety. But it stood like that beside our bed for almost twenty years.

About a […]

The Joy of Redemption

For me, addiction to pornography was bondage. The siren call was irresistible. Over and over again I went back to it and was unable to break away. (Later I would learn that viewing porn released chemicals in my brain that brought not only good feelings but also the need for higher doses of those chemicals to get the same feelings again.) Even though I was a believer in Christ, I had taken on the yoke of slavery to sin through porn.

Galatians 5:1 says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves […]

A Mind Renewed

Revealing my addiction to pornography was the start of my journey, and repentance was the next step. I didn’t realize it at the time, but as I confessed to God and repented of my sin, there was a change happening to me. Or maybe I should say happening inside of me. Having spent years directing many of my thoughts, and much of my time and energy toward porn, now there were new thoughts—thoughts that did not conform to the same pattern of the earlier part of my life. I was being made new again. I was being refreshed. I was […]

The Heart, Eyes, and Feet of Repentance

In my blog last week, I wrote about the confession of my addiction to pornography. The revelation, or confession, of my sin to God was the key to the gate of freedom. But I don’t think the gate really swung open for me until I began to repent. Revealing the ways that I sinned against God was the start. It put my heart in a posture of honesty. Repentance was the next step. It put my heart in a posture of humility. In its simplest terms, repentance is turning away from sin and turning back to God. But God taught […]

Revealing the Heart

There’s no socially acceptable way to say this: I struggled with pornography for decades, and it became an addiction 10 years ago. The pull was merciless. I was desperate to find a way to be free of the sin that bound me and pulled me deeper into darkness. I wanted help, but I was ashamed of my sin. I needed a way of escape, but I didn’t want to reveal my addiction for the world to see. I prayed for God to take away the desire to look at porn. I tried as hard as I could to avoid it. […]